Kung Fu Kitten

So, went to the cinema the other day (that would make a change I hear you cry!) to see the remake of the 80’s show Miami Vice.  Now, the Miami Vice I knew had lots of guns, lots of speed boats, bad pastel shirts with beige suites and quite frankly it rocked….I know I shouldn’t admit it but it did, it just rocked!

The film on the other hand just sucked!  My friend and I lasted all but 40 minutes before vacating the theatre on its opening day.  Hmmmm, where to start tearing this one apart….well first I’ll give you the plot line:  One of the moles for the Vice Cops is set up and killed, with his family tortured to death.  It is decided that Crockett & Tubbs will infiltrate drug trafficking to flush out the squeeler, and of course get caught up in the life of a drug trafficker and the lines get blurred! Are they cops or drug traffickers?!?!?!?

In the opening scene you aren’t given any background on our fiesty characters Crockett and Tubbs, you are just thrown into the action, no titles, no nothing man!  Not a very good start in my opinion, especially if you didn’t watch the series.  It doesn’t make you have any empathy for the characters.  Also, Michael Mann chose to shoot on digital handheld and the camera work is very shakey and low budget looking.  I gather that he was trying to show how gritty the life of under cover vice cops in Miami really is, but it doesn’t ring true for me.  Another complaint is the sound.  The digital cameras appear to be of a low quality and thusly the sound is dreadful…I could barely make out any of what the characters were saying the majority of the time and thusly I didn’t have a clue what was going on…don’t get me wrong, I got the jist of it….drugs…guns…sex…booze!  However, I couldn’t quite make out an actual plot line due to the murmering and speaking while turned away from the camera….not clever Michael, just silly!

My other, other complaint is that Jamie Foxx is barely used…now I liked Collateral….I thought Michael did well with it and Jamie was fanastic in it…well worth the money, but he is totally under used in this film and frankly it’s a crime!  On the other hand there is just no end to Colin Farrell’s shakey accent and horrible greasy hairdooooooo!  He is in virtually every scene but continues to let me down as an actor…he was just terrible.

I actually got the feeling that Michael Mann had something better to do on the side as the film just doesn’t feel like a labour of love….I felt that the actors were left to flounder and come up with their own direction and it made it into a really shoddy piece of cinema….sorry guys!  I have to give it 1 outta 5.  I would stay away from this film folks…..if you want to see JAmie Foxx act then I suggest renting ‘Ray’ the film he won the Oscar for, and Colin Farrell I suggest ‘Phonebooth’, shot in real time and just fantastic.

If anyone else has a nicer opinion that will perhaps change my perspective on this poor poor excuse for a film then please leave a comment at the usual address….